PERSONALITY OF THE QURANIC GOD

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"We parted the sea... and drowned the people of Pharaoh"

Quran 2:50; similar: 17:103

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah is very proud of his list of murders of humans.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"And ˹remember˺ when Moses said to his people, 'Allah commands you to sacrifice a cow.'... They said, 'Call upon your Lord to specify for us its colour.' He replied, 'Allah says, "It should be a bright yellow cow—pleasant to see."'"

Quran 2:67-69

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah asks to sacrifice a yellow cow for him. Like a good old archaic deity.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Allah is certainly the enemy of the disbelievers."

Quran 2:98

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah created people by his design and now positions himself as an enemy of many of them. So immature.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"As for those who disbelieve, I will let them enjoy themselves for a little while, then I will condemn them to the torment of the Fire."

Quran 2:126

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

It's just because Allah can't do anything to them in real life. It's hard to act in the real world when you aren't real.

----------------------------------------------

 

"Whoever returns [to dealing in interest or usury] - those are the companions of the Fire; they will abide eternally therein."

Quran 2:275

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah seems to be strongly against the prosperity of humanity. Loans with interest are driving innovation and development. God wants people to stay in caves, reciting Quran.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Allah does not like the disbelievers."

Quran 3:32; similar: 30:45

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah is so weak that his affection towards the creatures he allegedly made is very conditional.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Whoever seeks a way other than Islam, it will never be accepted from them, and in the Hereafter they will be among the losers."

Quran 3:85; similar: 3:110

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Contrary to a popular opinion among Muslims, Quran and its god condemns all non-Muslims, including Christians.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Allah has cursed them for their disbelief, so they believe not"

Quran 4:46

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah blocked them from ever believing because they didn't believe. There is no nobility in such a decision. Only low-level resentment.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Allah does not forgive associating others with Him ˹in worship˺"

Quran 4:48; 4:116

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah's fragile pride can't handle a competitor for humans' attention.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Those who disbelieve in Our verses - We will drive them into a fire. Every time their skins are roasted through, We will replace them with other skins so they may taste the punishment."

Quran 4:56; similar: 14:49-50

(Sahih International translation)

 

God thought through the process to maximize the agony of people for having another opinion.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Whatever good befalls you is from Allah and whatever evil befalls you is from yourself."

Quran 4:79

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah only takes credit for the good and leaves the blame for the bad to you.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Those who have believed then disbelieved, then believed then disbelieved, and then increased in disbelief - never will Allah forgive them"

Quran 4:137

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah is thin-skinned like a human, quick to take offense

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Never will Allah give the disbelievers over the believers a way [to overcome them]."

Quran 4:141

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah is consistently failing again and again at fulfilling this promise.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Those who say, "We are Christians"... We caused among them animosity and hatred until the Day of Resurrection."

Quran 5:14

(Sahih International translation)

 

"The Jews... We have cast among them animosity and hatred until the Day of Resurrection."

Quran 5:64

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah, the lord of hatred.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"The penalty for those who wage war against Allah and His Messenger and spread mischief in the land is death, crucifixion, cutting off their hands and feet on opposite sides, or exile from the land."

Quran 5:33

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Note that the punishment is established only for a war against Allah and the Messenger. Allah is cool with all other wars because a typical god never cares about people's lives anyway.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"If Allah had willed, He would have made you one community"

Quran 5:48

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Instead, he decided to split people into religious groups, clashing with each other for no good reason.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Have they not seen how many ˹disbelieving˺ peoples We destroyed before them?"

Quran 6:6; similar: 17:17; 19:74; 19:98; 20:128; 36:31; 38:3; 50:36

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Bragging about destruction achievements. Divine.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"The pagans’ evil associates have made it appealing to them to kill their own children... Had it been Allah’s Will, they would not have done such a thing."

Quran 6:137

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Apparently, it is Allah's will for polytheists to kill their children.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Who then does more wrong than those who deny Allah’s revelations and turn away from them? We will reward those who turn away from Our revelations with a dreadful punishment for turning away."

Quran 6:157

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

"Who does more wrong than those who fabricate lies against Allah or deny His revelations?"

Quran 7:37; similar: 10:17; 11:18; 61:7

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

The worst sin is denying Quran and fabricating lies against Allah (as if anyone knows a reliable truth). Why? Maybe because god's popularity is the most important thing to him. Or maybe because religious leaders want to maintain and increase their influence.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"And how many cities have We destroyed, and Our punishment came to them at night or while they were sleeping at noon."

Quran 7:4

(Sahih International translation)

 

Bragging about terrorism achievements. A role model.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"You will certainly be subjected to your Lord’s torment and wrath."

Quran 7:71

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Some claim that Allah is super cool and is above human emotions, but no, he gets into wrath mode when someone doesn't give him the reaction that he wants. He is so dependent on humans.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"We certainly seized the people of Pharaoh with years of famine and a deficiency in fruits... We plagued them with floods, locusts, lice, frogs, and blood"

Quran 7:130-133

(Sahih International translation)

 

Collective punishment of many for actions of a few is not a fair judgment policy. And by the way, where was god in the following centuries of oppression of different nations? He was staying on the pages of an old book of fictional legends.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"We drowned them in the sea because they denied Our signs and were heedless of them."

Quran 7:136; similar: 10:73; 21:76-77; 25:37

(Sahih International translation)

 

Many groups of people nowadays deny 'signs' of the Quran and are heedless to them, but Allah is not able to drown them, except by the hands of those who are trying to help their imaginary sky dad.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"The wrongdoers among them changed the words they were commanded to say. So We sent down a punishment from the heavens upon them for their wrongdoing."

Quran 7:162

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Because Allah is incapable of communicating without the help of people, he says he'll punish those who twist his words, but we never see it happening.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Your Lord inspired to the angels... 'I will cast terror into the hearts of those who disbelieved, so strike [them] upon the necks and strike from them every fingertip.'"

Quran 8:12

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah, the lord of terror, needs angels' help with striking the necks and fingers of disbelievers. In other verses, he is asking his human adepts for similar help, too.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"If your parents and children and siblings and spouses and extended family and the wealth you have acquired and the trade you fear will decline and the homes you cherish—˹if all these˺ are more beloved to you than Allah and His Messenger and struggling in His Way, then wait until Allah brings about His Will."

Quran 9:24

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Given how people are wired by alleged god's creating design, expecting people to put religion above everyone and everything is very egoistic of god. Someone could tell: yeah, Allah is egoistic because he can do whatever he wants. But that makes him quite a pitiful god.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Fight those who do not believe in Allah... nor comply with what Allah and His Messenger have forbidden... until they pay the tax"

Quran 9:29

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah's favor can be bought with money, which goes to the religious leaders. Perfect.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Those who do not expect to meet Us, being pleased and content with this worldly life, and who are heedless of Our signs, they will have the Fire as a home"

Quran 10:7-8

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah gave you life but he will torture you in hell if you enjoy the life that he gave you.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"His Throne was upon the waters—in order to test which of you is best in deeds."

Quran 11:7

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

God is unaware of our mindsets and needs to run test scenarios to figure out what we will do in different scenarios.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Awaiting them is Hell, and they will be left to drink oozing pus, which they will sip with difficulty, and can hardly swallow."

Quran 14:16-17

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

The pain of fire alone wasn't enough to cool down Allah's pointless anger at disbelievers. He stretches his fake promised punishment into the area of disgust.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"If He willed, He could have guided you all."

Quran 16:9

(Sahih International translation)

 

But deliberately chose not to so that more people end up in hell.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Those before them had plotted, but Allah struck at the ˹very˺ foundation of their structure, so the roof collapsed on top of them"

Quran 16:26

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah's actions are very similar to accidents. Accidents with good timing are perceived as Allah's actions. The ones with bad timing remain just accidents.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"When We intend to destroy a city... We destroy it with [complete] destruction."

Quran 17:16; similar: 21:6; 22:45; 28:58; 46:27; 54:51

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah, the lord of destruction.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"There is no city but that We will destroy it before the Day of Resurrection or punish it with a severe punishment."

Quran 17:58

(Sahih International translation)

 

Such hunger for destruction.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Those who disbelieved will have cut out for them garments of fire. Poured upon their heads will be scalding water by which is melted that within their bellies and [their] skins. And for [striking] them are maces of iron. Every time they want to get out of it [i.e., Hellfire] from anguish, they will be returned to it, and [it will be said], 'Taste the punishment of the Burning Fire!'"

Quran 22:19-22; similar: 18:29

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah can't stop relishing and savoring the upcoming all-encompassing everlasting punishment of people through pain and humiliation. Poor guy. He needs help.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Permission [to fight] has been given to those who are being fought, because they were wronged. And indeed, Allah is competent to give them victory."

Quran 22:39

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah can't intervene himself but can merely 'help' humans in battles against the swords of others for the same reason why Santa can't bring gifts to children himself and needs human parents to step in.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Whoever has disbelieved... We grant them enjoyment for a little; then We will force them to a massive punishment."

Quran 31:23-24

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah doesn't do anything with disbelievers in this life not because he waits until they die, but because he is fictional and thus can't do anything to them, just like Zeus can't.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Those who disbelieve will be addressed, 'The hatred of Allah for you was [even] greater than your hatred of yourselves [this Day in Hell] when you were invited to faith, but you disbelieved [i.e., refused].'"

Quran 40:10; similar: 34:45; 35:26

(Sahih International translation)

 

Quran says that Allah hates disbelievers. It takes a special kind of immaturity to design and create people in the way they are and then hate them for acting accordingly.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"In anything over which you disagree - its ruling is [to be referred] to Allah."

Quran 42:10

(Sahih International translation)

 

But he never tells his response to anyone clearly.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"He... leaves whoever He wills infertile."

Quran 42:50

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah's plan:
1. Create the universe
2. Make Bob infertile

 

 ----------------------------------------------

 

"Here you are - those invited to spend in the cause of Allah - but among you are those who withhold [out of greed]."

Quran 47:38

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah wants you to spend money for his cause because he is unable to pay for it himself.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Then which of your Lord’s favours will you both deny? ˹They will be˺ maidens with gorgeous eyes, reserved in pavilions... No human or jinn has ever touched these ˹maidens˺ before."

Quran 55:71-74; similar 55:55-56; 56:35-38

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah keeps a group of virgins locked in heavenly pavilions to be sex slaves of the Muslims in the afterlife. A reward for promoting his doctrine.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"˹As for˺ those who defy Allah and His Messenger, they will definitely be among the most debased. Allah has decreed, 'I and My messengers will certainly prevail.'"

Quran 58:20-21

(translated by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)

 

Allah is always trying to take credit for the military and other achievements of people. But in reality, he was with them only in their imagination.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"O you who have believed, let not your wealth and your children divert you from the remembrance of Allah"

Quran 63:9

(Sahih International translation)

 

"Your wealth and your children are but a trial"

Quran 64:15

(Sahih International translation)

 

Maybe Allah understands the weakness of his religion and tries to make parents think that when their children incline them towards disbelief it's not because disbelief makes more sense but because it's a test done on purpose, and so you need to resist it with a multiplied effort.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"For the righteous is attainment - gardens and grapevines. And full-breasted [companions] of equal age."

Quran 78:31-33

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah shares some specifics of his sexual standards.

 

----------------------------------------------

 

"Say, 'I seek refuge in the Lord of daybreak from the evil of that which He created'"

Quran 113:1-2

(Sahih International translation)

 

Allah created sources of evil to ensure there is fuel for the hellfire.