PROPHECIES YOU DON'T HEAR ABOUT BECAUSE THEY FAILED

 

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"The Lord said to Moses, '...Go up to the land I promised on oath to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob... I will send an angel before you and drive out the Canaanites,...and Jebusites.'"

Exodus 33:1-2, Bible (NIV)

VS.
"Jebusites dwell with the children of Benjamin in Jerusalem unto this day."

Judges 1:21, Bible (NIV)

"To this day the Canaanites live among the people of Ephraim"

Joshua 16:10, Bible (NIV)

 

Canaanites and Jebusites turned out to be tougher than God, so he was unable to fulfill his prophecy about driving them out.

 

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"The tenth day of this seventh month is the Day of Atonement... I [God] will destroy from among their people [the Israelites] anyone who does any work on that day. You shall do no work at all. This is to be a lasting ordinance for the generations to come, wherever you live."

Leviticus 23: 27-31, Bible (NIV)

 

Plenty of the Israelites work on that day every year, but God doesn't keep his promise to destroy them. Is he taking a nap or something?

 

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"The images of their gods you are to burn in the fire. Do not covet the silver and gold on them, and do not take it for yourselves... for it is detestable to the Lord your God. Do not bring a detestable thing into your house or you, like it, will be set apart for destruction."

Deuteronomy 7:25-26, Bible (NIV)

 

Do you have anything at home that was made from a recycled image or a figure of a non-biblical god? You likely have some remains of at least one "idol", even if you think you don't. Bad news: the biblical God will kill you for that. Good news: he always fails to deliver on his pledges in real life, so you're safe.

 

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"The righteous person may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all"

Psalm 34:19, Bible (NIV)

"Whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm."

Proverbs 1:33, Bible (NIV)

 

Concentration camp death pits filled with bodies of decent adults and children prove this announcement wrong.

 

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"The Lord... heals all your diseases"

Psalm 103:2-3, Bible (NIV)

 

Despite loud slogans, God doesn't get even close to the healing effectiveness of modern medicine. Not even close.

 

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"You [God] open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing."

Psalm 145:16, Bible (NIV)

 

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"The Lord does not let the righteous go hungry, but he thwarts the craving of the wicked."

Proverbs 10:3, Bible (NIV)

"What the wicked dread will overtake them; what the righteous desire will be granted."

Proverbs 10:24, Bible (NIV)

"The righteous person is rescued from trouble, and it falls on the wicked instead."

Proverbs 11:8, Bible (NIV)

"No harm overtakes the righteous, but the wicked have their fill of trouble."

Proverbs 12:21, Bible (NIV)

 

Such a cheap lie. You need to shut your eyes and ears in order to genuinely believe that bad things happen only to bad people, while good people always have a comfortable life, as the Bible states.

 

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"Jerusalem... The uncircumcised and defiled will not enter you again."

Isaiah 52:1, Bible (NIV)

 

God keeps promising and then not delivering. There are thousands of uncircumcised in Jerusalem at any given moment.

 

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"The nation or kingdom that will not serve you [Israel] will perish; it will be utterly ruined."

Isaiah 60:12, Bible (NIV)

 

God forgot that he guaranteed to destroy any country that doesn't serve Israel. That's almost all nations in existence.

 

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"'If any nation does not listen, I will completely uproot and destroy it,' declares the Lord."

Jeremiah 12:17, Bible (NIV)

 

More empty threats.

 

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"All the kingdoms on the face of the earth... the sword I will send among you... I am calling down a sword on all who live on the earth, declares the Lord Almighty... At that time those slain by the Lord will be everywhere — from one end of the earth to the other. They... will be like dung lying on the ground... Your time to be slaughtered has come"

Jeremiah 25:25-34, Bible (NIV)

 

This passage is not about the apocalypse. God was taking pleasure imagining the global bloodbath he planned to perform very shortly; he was unable to make it happen though.

 

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"The Lord says: 'David will never fail to have a man to sit on the throne of Israel, nor will the Levitical priests ever fail to have a man to stand before me continually to offer burnt offerings, to burn grain offerings and to present sacrifices.'"

Jeremiah 33:17-18, Bible (NIV)

 

Anyone remotely familiar with the reality can conclude this prophecy to be failed. But many excuses were and will be made up, appealing to some imaginary figurative meaning of this failed promise to make it look not-so-failed.

 

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"The Lord says: 'See how the waters are rising in the north... They will overflow the land and everything in it, the towns and those who live in them... the day has come to destroy all the Philistines'"

Jeremiah 47:2-4, Bible (NIV)

 

The Philistines — today called the Palestinians — are still around. God was unable to keep his word to destroy them all.

As a side note: some people like to point out some fulfilled God's promises as a "proof" of their faith, but making hundreds of predictions — like God does — and have them all failed is very improbable. When someone makes hundreds of predictions, at least a few of them will materialize by coincidence, not this one though. Those few lucky promises are celebrated and called out by the Church. Many more unfulfilled ones are ignored or shamelessly distorted.

 

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"Moab will be destroyed as a nation because she defied the Lord."

Jeremiah 48:42, Bible (NIV)

 

There are more people and nations defying the biblical god than not defying him, but God can't extend his destroying power beyond pages of the old book of myths.

 

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"The Lord will be terrible unto them [Moabites and Ammonites]: for he will famish all the gods of the earth"

Zephaniah 2:11, Bible (KJV)

 

God procrastinated on this one for quite a while. Instead of Yahweh finishing off other gods, soon education will finish him off instead. The pattern is solid: qualitative education — which gives people skills to think rationally — indirectly helps people understand that biblical god is nothing more than a myth. Not all people and not all the time, but the trend is there. Sooner or later Yahweh will join the team of Zeus, Anubis, and other extinct deities.

 

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"Never again will an oppressor overrun my people [the Israelites], for now I [God] am keeping watch."

Zechariah 9:8, Bible (NIV)

 

The more God prophesies, the more he fails.

 

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"All the nations that have attacked Jerusalem will go up year after year to worship the King, the Lord Almighty, and to celebrate the Festival of Tabernacles. If any of the peoples of the earth do not go up to Jerusalem to worship the King, the Lord Almighty, they will have no rain."

Zechariah 14:16-17, Bible (NIV)

 

Almost the entire earth should have become a desert by now. God should have watched himself before making statements he is unable to back up.

 

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"He [Jesus] went and lived in a town called Nazareth. So was fulfilled what was said through the prophets, that he would be called a Nazarene."

Matthew 2:23, Bible (NIV)

 

There is no prophecy in the Old Testament about the Messiah being called a Nazarene.

 

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"Ask and it will be given to you... for everyone who asks receives"

Matthew 7:7-8 = Luke 11:9-10, Bible (NIV)

 

God tends to forget this promise when people start asking for a terminally ill child to get healthy, or for a war to stop, or for food and water in a drought-stricken area, or for pretty much anything.

 

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"Truly I [Jesus] tell you, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom."

Matthew 16:28, Bible (NIV); similar: Mark 9:1, Luke 9:27

 

Those people are all long dead, and the Son of Man is still not around.

 

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"If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

Matthew 17:20, Bible (NIV); similar: Matthew 21:21, Mark 11:23-24, Luke 17:6

 

Plenty of people had enough faith to die for it, but there is still no reliable evidence of any of them ever beating physics. Jesus presents it as a common practice for believers, but faith beats physics only in unverifiable testimonies from questionable sources.

 

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"I [Jesus] tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven."

Matthew 18:19, Bible (NIV)

 

Then why are there so many groups in churches praying for something good for years with no result? Because the Bible is a bunch of bullshit.

 

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"If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer."

Matthew 21:22, Bible (NIV)

"I [Jesus] tell you, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name... Ask and you will receive"

John 16:23-24, Bible (NIV)

 

God promises 100% response rate, but the real rate of answers vs. requests reveals that rare "responses" to prayers fall into the normal probability of coincidences. Unusual coincidences happen to everyone. If nothing unusual ever happened to a person, that is the most unusual that can happen.

 

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"This gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come."

Matthew 24:14, Bible (NIV)

"The message is heard through the word about Christ. But I ask: Did they not hear? Of course they did: 'Their voice has gone out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world.'"

Romans 10:17-18, Bible (NIV)

"This is the gospel that you heard and that has been proclaimed to every creature under heaven"

Colossians 1:23, Bible (NIV)

 

The Bible states that the gospel was already preached in the whole world ~2000 years ago, and this is when the end of the world was supposed to come. Has God's "End of the World" red button permanently jammed?

 

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"Then will appear the sign of the Son of Man [Jesus] in heaven. And then all the peoples of the earth will mourn when they see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven, with power and great glory. And he will send his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds... I [Jesus] tell you, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened."

Matthew 24:30-34, Bible (NIV); similar: Mark 13:26-30, Luke 21:10-32

 

Jesus directly prophesied that the end of the world with the global collection of all "saved" people will happen within the lifetime of the generation he spoke to. But nothing happened... Doesn't that make him a false prophet?

 

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"These signs will accompany those who believe: in my [Jesus'] name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well."

Mark 16:17-18, Bible (NIV)

 

This is a direct and literal description of the features of a believer. Do you think you are a believer, saved by God? If you can't do these things, then you're not a believer. Unless the book is lying. Well, it is lying.

 

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"Do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink... your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well."

Luke 12:29-31, Bible (NIV)

 

Throughout history, countless famines with countless sincere Christians dying of starvation debunk this nice but empty promise from Jesus.

 

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"He [Jesus] said... 'Everything must be fulfilled that is written about me in the Law of Moses, the Prophets and the Psalms... This is what is written: The Messiah will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, and repentance for the forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem.'"

Luke 24:44-47, Bible (NIV)

 

Where the hell is it written in the Old Testament that the Messiah will rise from the dead on the third day, and repentance for the forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem? Nowhere. This passage is just a dishonest attempt of the author to link Christianity with Judaism to create an illusion of continuity.

 

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"If you believed Moses, you would believe me [Jesus], for he wrote about me."

John 5:46, Bible (NIV)

 

Jesus continues pretending that Moses wrote something about him. Where specifically?

 

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"Very truly I [Jesus] tell you, whoever believes in me will do the works I have been doing, and they will do even greater things than these... And I will do whatever you ask in my name... You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it."

John 14:12-14, Bible (NIV)

 

The abilities of "whoever believes in Jesus" are not even close to his predictions. The same goes for his productivity in answering the prayers. Was he delusional or did he lie on purpose?

 

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"The Holy Spirit... will teach you all things"

John 14:26, Bible (NIV)

 

Teachings of the Holy Spirit are suspiciously correlated with personal preferences, as well as with practices of the denomination. It's very far from being as universal as it is claimed to be. Just like most of the other psychological illusions people are living in.

 

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"I [Jesus] pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you... I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one... so that they may be brought to complete unity."

John 17:20-23, Bible (NIV)

 

God didn't answer your prayer? Don't worry, he didn't answer Jesus' prayer either. Otherwise, Christians would be "as one" and in "complete unity". Having a few good friends from your denomination is not enough to consider this prayer answered.

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"When they came to Jesus and found that he was already dead, they did not break his legs... These things happened so that the scripture would be fulfilled: 'Not one of his bones will be broken,'"

John 19:33-36, Bible (NIV)

 

There is a problem with this "fulfilling" — the prophecy is missing. There is a regulation to not break bones of lambs when cooking and eating them at Passover, and there is a psalm falsely claiming that God protects his followers, and doesn't allow even one of their bones to be broken. Neither are prophecies about the Messiah.

 

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"I [Paul] am saying nothing beyond what the prophets and Moses said would happen — that the Messiah... as the first to rise from the dead, would bring the message of light"

Acts 26:22-23, Bible (NIV)

"Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures... he was buried... he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures"

1 Corinthians 15:3-4, Bible (NIV)

 

More references to prophecies of Christ's resurrection from the Old Testament that don't exist. If you think of Psalm 16:10, please read it first. All it says is that David believes that God will not abandon him [David] in the realm of the dead. Nothing about the Messiah or his resurrection. Psalm 22, you say? Nothing about resurrection there either, only the guesses of apologists that assume a resurrection. Read it. Isaiah 53? Assumptions on top of assumptions are needed to claim that it speaks of resurrection. There are no prophecies about the resurrection of the Messiah.

 

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"All things work together for good to them that love God"

Romans 8:28, Bible (NIV)

 

If lethal diseases or painful violent death are on God's list of good things, then maybe. Many believers died in these horrible ways. Even if you "solve" this with "they get eternal compensation" pitch, then what about things that made believers unbelievers and made them go to hell? If you "solve" this with "they never were true believers" pitch, then you're a heretic because the Bible says that saved believers can get "unsaved" (e.g. Hebrews 6:4-8, 2 Peter 2:20-21). Long story short, Romans 8:28 is false.

 

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"The God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet."

Romans 16:20, Bible (NIV)

 

God needs time to prepare for it. It was supposed to happen to the recipients of this epistle living ~2000 years ago, after Christ's alleged resurrection, but up to now, God is still preparing. However, that doesn't stop some Christians from ridiculous "stomping on Satan" practices.

 

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"Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple?... If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy that person"

1 Corinthians 3:16-17, Bible (NIV)

 

Where is God destroying those who killed Christians? Em... Let's just continue playing the game of ignoring that biblical promises do not intersect with real life.

 

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"I [apostle Paul] tell you [Corinthians] a mystery: We will not all sleep [die], but we will all be changed — in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed."

1 Corinthians 15:51-52, Bible (NIV)

"They [some biblical stories] are written for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the world are come."

1 Corinthians 10:11, Bible (KJV)

 

The God-inspired text addressed to Corinthians says that the end of the world will come upon them, and they will be raptured along with the author. It didn't happen. Why? Because biblical religion is a hoax.

 

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"It was good of you to share in my [apostle Paul's] troubles... You sent me aid more than once... I have received full payment... I have received from Epaphroditus the gifts you sent. They are a fragrant offering, an acceptable sacrifice, pleasing to God. And my God will meet all your needs"

Philippians 4:14-19, Bible (NIV)

 

Many people keep the offerings to God coming — or to his clerics to be precise — but God still isn't meeting their needs.

 

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"Once in the end of the world hath he [Jesus] appeared to put away sin by the sacrifice of himself."

Hebrews 9:26, Bible (KJV)

"The end of all things is near."

1 Peter 4:7, Bible (NIV)

"This is the last hour... even now many antichrists have come. This is how we know it is the last hour... Continue in him [Jesus], so that when he appears we may be confident and unashamed... When Christ appears, we shall be like him"

1 John 2:18,28; 3:2, Bible (NIV)

"The apostles... said to you, 'In the last times there will be scoffers'... These are the people who divide you"

Jude 1:17-19, Bible (NIV)

 

A bunch of God-inspired authors of the New Testament clearly expected and promised to their contemporaries that the end of the world will happen very soon, shortly after Christ's crucifixion. Fiasco.

 

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"Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well... Pray for each other so that you may be healed."

James 5:14-16, Bible (NIV)

 

As Ricky Gervais tweeted: "You don't see faith healers working in hospitals for the same reason that you don't see psychics winning the lottery every week."

 

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"Whatsoever we [Christians] ask, we receive of him [God]"

1 John 3:22, Bible (KJV)

A game that God can't lose. He doesn't even need to do or say anything. People will always come up with "explanations" of his failures for him.

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